Updated 6/18/08!
If you know a famous person (or if you ARE a famous person) who would like to punch me in the stomach, email me at...
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John Cleese |
I was just returning to my car after
picking up a prescription at my local pharmacy when suddenly the
internationally beloved star of Monty Python and Fawlty
Towers jumped out from behind a recycle bin, socked me in
the belly, and made off with my Ritalin. |
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Ok, this was totally uncalled for!
I simply pointed out to her that on stardate 51244.3, when Seven
of Nine goes into the turbolift she says "Deck 5". However,
when the turbolift doors open she gets out and walks to the
Mess Hall... How can she be in the Mess Hall if she is on Deck
5? The Mess Hall is on Deck 2 right below the bridge!!!... On
second thought, I guess I deserved this one.
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I tried to tell her that I loved the
movie Splash... Especially the naked parts.... Come on!
It was a compliment!!! |
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I was just leaving El Pollo Loco, when comedian Sarah Silverman
came running out after me, claiming that I'd stolen her flour
tortilla. After she'd beaten me severely, she realized that
she'd actually ordered corn tortillas. She apologized,
punched me again, and left.
* Her fist was out of frame. But with the wonders
of modern computer graphics I was able to simulate the bottom
part of the picture perfectly.
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The star of The Man Show and Jimmy Kimmel Live didn't think
the computer graphics I used on his girlfriend, Sarah Silverman's
photo were very good... So he tracked me down, took me back
to the same El Pollo Loco and beat the crap out of me. He really should have been more greatful considering that I could have easily made it look like she was doing something much more enjoyable to me.
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This Saturday Night Live star did some major
damage to me. A punch AND a Vulcan neck pinch. She was mad at
me for wearing the same top as her... Apparently, she's severely
colorblind... And sleeve-length blind. |
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Also from SNL... He is actually fast asleep.
But he has a condition called Narcopunchia. |
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Best known for playing the Holographic Doctor on Star
Trek Voyager... This proves that he's NOT really a hologram! |
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I asked this star of "Curb Your Enthusiasm"
if he was on an improvised television show because he has trouble
memorizing lines. He responded by improvising his fist into
my stomach.
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Christopher Lloyd |
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This was a charity event. Mr. Lloyd raised over $40,000 for Amnesty International by pummeling me senseless for 3 hours. |
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Mr. Winkler thought I was uncool, so he gave me a "punch-o-mundo"!
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Penn & Teller |
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In an episode of their emmy nominated Showtime series, Penn & Teller attempt to prove that punching me in the stomach is Bullshit.
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If you know a famous person (or if you ARE a famous person) who would like to punch me in the stomach, email me at...
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